Avoiding homework

It's been a few days...


Life is so full right now. Part of me adores it, most of me despises it. On the plus side, I am now able to check off giving my last presentation from my list. That was this afternoon, and it actually when really well. Making video presentations are a lot more fun than just giving an oral one. Of course I had to take advantage of the opportunity. It was quite the long-drawn out journey to make it though. It probably wasn't the wisest choice to make when there is so much else going on to occupy the day. But that's ok. It was just another testimony of God's faithfulness. He always provides strength, even to a burned-out complaining college student. He is good. 
I'm thinking about all that is left to do before the semester is out, and praisallelujah! Two weeks from today I'll be done. So! Only two more papers, three tests, a few classes, and three finals. Totally obtainable. Actually... I should be preparing right now for something. Maybe doing research for a paper or making study notes for finals. But nah. I just am not feeling it. Instead, I decided to venture to the lake to just spend some time away and with Jesus. Do you ever have those moments where you just want to blare worship music and sing at the top of your lungs? I have those a lot. And usually I can't fully blare my music and sing as obnoxiously as I wish. Someone would probably call the cops on my intruding of their quietness. Today, though, I could. I forgot how much I loved whole-hearted worship. Worshiping alone is so much different than worshiping with other believers. Neither are better than each other, but have different levels, or different kinds, of intimacy with our Father. When it's just Jesus and me, I have complete freedom to worship Him FULLY and recklessly. With all abandonment. Is that not intense? I think it is. What a way to remind us kiddos the vastness of our God and the breathtaking intimacy. Intimacy we have available  for us to have with this Maker of the breath we are so reliant on to live. I am so reliant on Him. He is so worthy, guys. And He loves us. He loves you, friend. 


I wish I knew or could feel this love that God gives. I mean fully grasp it. I don't even understand it, but I want it so desperately, and constantly. I want more and more and more of it, and when I don't feel it, I long for it to come back. What kind of craziness is that? What kind of freak craves love so desperately that they can never get enough of it? I don't know! But that's the kind of freak I want to be. I just can't settle for other things, they don't do it for me. There are so many things that I could run to...physical pleasures, people, money, possessions... In fact I have run to them in various capacities. But they don't give me the sense of satisfaction that He gives me. And I don't get why that is. In some funky and unexplainable way, Jesus is better than all of the things I could run to. Do you get at all what I feel? 
Strive to. Search for it. Ask questions. Find answers. And I'm here if you wonder or face confusion. 






He is greater than anything we reach for because He's the one reaching for us.