Lead me to Your heart...

"He is most glorified in you when you're most satisfied in Him."


I love John Piper. :) His passion is ridiculously contagious! And humbling, to be quite frank. I find myself listening to his sermons both convicted and yet pumped simultaneously. And I love that! I love the challenges He bluntly gives, I love the delight he has in Christ, I love the joy he receives from sharing his heart with people. I pray that is what I am to others. That my delight is in Him. That my heart hungers for His joy daily. That His passion will overflow from my being. That my heart will cry more and more for the lost and broken so much that, even in pain and doubt, I can exclaim:
"But whatever was to my profit I now consider loss for the sake of Christ."
That's my heart cry. Even though I doubt Him at times, or when I yell at Him for life's circumstances and brokenness. Even though daily I struggle upward, He's changing me. He's molding me. And yes, I'm not who I will be some day, but I'm also not who I was even six months ago. In Him, I'm living a crazy full life. And I wouldn't trade this adventure for a life of normality and bliss. That's not what I signed up for. I want to see lives changed. I want to bring His insane love to the hurting and lost. There's so much life ahead of me, and this current pain, or wonder about the cancer, or stressful obstacles don't compare to this passion for a Christ-glorified adventure I have. I don't want to waste my life...


On that note. Ha. I have a visit to the thyroid doctor in the morning. I admit, I'm getting a little anxious. I'm ready to know answers! Or at least to have a grasp on the situation. At this point, I have no idea what to expect. I don't even know who this dude is, but apparently I trust him enough to let Him stick a needle in my throat. Yum. My prayer is that he will know exactly how to proceed with the tumors. And honestly, to get rid of them. My desire is that the tumors are causing the neck pain and through the (possible) cancer removal I can have relief. Something I haven't had in nearly four years. I'm ready for God to bring rest to my weary body. The thought that if even just possibly having an answer blows my mind. It makes me emotional. But even if I never know why I have this "ghost" nerve pain, God is still faithful.


"Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near."  Philippians 4:4 & 5


Ally