Decrease me.

So in sunday school this morning, this passage really got to me. I guess instead of trying to explain it, I'll just let God do His thing through His Word. 
Here we go.


2 Corinthians 11:16-30



I repeat: Let no one take me for a fool. But if you do, then receive me just as you would a fool, so that I may do a little boasting. In this self-confident boasting I am not talking as the Lord would, but as a fool. Since many are boasting in the way the worlds does, I too will boast. You gladly put up with fools since you are so wise! In fact, you even put up with anyone who enslaves you or exploits you or takes advantage of you or pushes himself forward or slaps you in the face. To my shame I admit that we were too weak for that! 
What anyone else dares to boast about--I am speaking as a fool--I also dare to boast about. Are they Hebrews? So am I. Are they Israelites? So am I. Are they Abraham's descendants? So am I. Are they servants of Christ? (I am out of my mind to talk like this.) I am more. I have worked much harder, been in prison more frequently, been flogged more severely and been exposed to death again and again. Five times I received from the Jews the forty lashes minus one. Three times I was beaten with rods, once I was stoned, three times I was shipwrecked, I spent a night and a day in the open sea, I have been constantly on the move. I have been in danger from rivers, in danger from bandits, in danger form my own countrymen, in danger from Gentiles; in danger in the city, in danger in the country, in danger at sea; and in danger from false brothers. I have labored and toiled and have often gone without sleep; I have known hunger and thirst and have often gone without food; I have been cold and naked. Besides everything else, I face daily pressure of my concern for all the churches. Who is weak, and I do not feel weak? Who is led into sin, and I do not inwardly burn?
If I must boast, I will boast of the things that show my weakness.


Wow? Reading that today was the first in probably almost a year or more. I definitely view it more powerfully today than I did when I read it the first time months ago. How many times a day do I find myself boasting in myself? Or. How many times a day do I complain about circumstances? I don't even want to admit to that, because I dislike complainers and boasters so much. Yet...here I am doing the same exact thing. "How can you say to your brother, 'Let me take the speck out of your eye,' when all this time there is a plank in your own eye?" 
Matthew 7:4 
^ That should be my life's theme verse. Spoken directly to an Ally Willis. 
I suppose this passage helped to put my life in perspective. Which God seemingly does, I notice. I have absolutely nothing to complain about. I definitely think I do. But really? There's nothing to complain about. Everything I complain about or boast in are trivial things. And things that don't fill me up; they leave me empty and searching for more. Paul had reasons to give up on God, on ministry, on life! But he never used his sufferings and obstacles as reasons to complain. His desire was to plea the complete opposite: "If I must boast, I will boast of the things that show my weakness." 2 Cor. 11:30


Dude. I want that heart so badly! To just expose my weaknesses more and more, and just cling to His strength. I want to expose my pride and let Him have the glory. I want to expose my insecurities and let Him break me of them. 
He is doing all of that, and my flesh hates it. So I cling to every mortal thing I can... boasting in the things I am good at. When actually... yeah. I'm not even slightly talented in them. It's by God's grace that I can even breath. My life is not my own. And because of that, I have absolutely no right boast in anything. Except. That I am His and that I belong to Him.

"Let not the wise man boast of his wisdom or the strong man boast of his strength or the rich man boast of his riches, but let him who boasts boast about this: that he understands and knows me, that I am the LORD, who exercises kindness, justice and righteousness on earth, for in these I delight." Jeremiah 9:23-24


Welp, this is what God has opened my eyes to today. Every day... a little more of me is broken away, and a little more of His heart is shown. 


Remember, He's sufficient. 


Ally