New Tribes.

Hey folks. So, I'm home from spending the weekend in Wisconsin now. It flew by so fast. I left this morning really sad, and unfortunately the feelings haven't left yet. It's so insane how much I already miss that place, the people, the fellowship. I suppose I wasn't completely aware of my hunger for spiritual fellowship until I received it from the New Tribers this weekend. To them, their fellowship is normal. It is such a foreign concept to me, though. The first night I was there, I went to meet a couple of girls in the dorm room I stayed in. As soon as we exchanged introductions they immediately asked me about me, my life, my walk with Christ, how they could pray for me. As emotional as I sound in writing this, I almost started crying right there on the spot. As simple as the conversation was, the fact that they took a mere few minutes to ask me about my life encouraged me immensely. I spoke with another girl about this a few nights later. She said that sometimes when one doesn't experience something in a long time, they forget how vital that one thing is to their life. She spoke truth. If it was my honest choice, I wouldn't have returned to Kirksville today. But His ways aren't my ways. 
Another thing I took away from the weekend was how incredible my boyfriend is. Even though I've said that before, I really am blessed by him. It's hard to honestly say that for the next year I'll live in the moment because my heart isn't here anymore at all. Going to New Tribes blessed me so much, but it also made things much more difficult. How could I spend a weekend surrounded by likeminded people, fellowship in Light and honestly say I'm joyful about returning to Kirksville? I want to say I am joyful. But I can't entirely. I am joyful in the Lord, in His presence, in His comfort. But I am not joyful with my circumstances. I pray that God will break me of this attitude. Quite frankly, though, it's really hard. Arielle, my sister, reminded me that God did supply me with nourishment, even if it only consisted of three days-worth. He always provides, He's my Jehovah Jirah. She also reminded me that inch by inch, it's a cinch. Mile by mile, it's a trial. 


Anyway, I know there is more I could write. Honestly, though, I'd rather go sleep for a few hours. Lord willing, I'll continue this post's thoughts more later. For now, goodnight.